Identity Triangle
Parent Introduction
You’re More Ready Than You Think
Discipling your kids doesn’t require a theology degree or a perfect home. It starts with something much simpler: being present, telling the truth about who God is, and helping your kids see who they are in Him.
The Identity Triangle is a simple picture that helps you do exactly that.
It teaches three powerful truths:
God is our Father, so your child can know they are deeply loved and secure.
Jesus is our King, so your child can learn to follow His way of life by loving and serving others.
The Holy Spirit is our Helper, so your child can grow confident in listening to His voice and joining His mission in the world.
You don’t have to have all the answers. You just have to show up, with love, honesty, and a willingness to grow alongside your child.
Here’s the truth: you’re already discipling your kids every time you pray together, ask forgiveness, celebrate kindness, or talk about God. This tool just gives you a bit more structure, language, and confidence to do it with intention.
One Month with the Identity Triangle
A Simple Family Discipleship Rhythm
We encourage you to spend one month focused on identity as a family.
Here’s the rhythm:
Week 1 – Big Picture
Walk through the full triangle together. Read, reflect, and explore how all three parts of the Trinity shape who we are.Week 2 – God the Father
Focus on what it means that God is a perfect Father, and that we are His beloved children.Week 3 – Jesus the Son
Focus on Jesus as our Servant King, and how we follow Him as disciples who serve.Week 4 – Holy Spirit
Focus on the Spirit as our Helper and Sender, and how we are missionaries, even now.
You can read each page together one evening a week, and come back to it in car rides, meals, bedtime, or whenever life gives you moments.
We’ve also added simple questions and suggestions on each page to help make it real, without making it complicated.
Week 1:
KNOWING WHO GOD IS TELLS ME WHO I AM
A Gospel Identity for Kids and Families
The World’s Equation vs. God’s Equation
Parents, always open with curiosity before instruction. It invites your children into the conversation rather than creating another environment that feels like school.
Start with something like, “Do you ever ask yourself questions? What do you ask? What are you curious about?” Create some room for response. You might get some interesting answers here.
As you get older, if you haven’t already asked questions like this, you probably will begin to wonder things like:
Who am I?
What makes me valuable?
What gives me purpose?
Depending on the age of your kids, you might ask here, “Have you ever asked questions like this before?” See what response they offer. It’s okay if they haven’t. You’re just making space to let them guide the conversation as well.
You might say something like, “These are questions that people ask to help us understand our identity, what we think about ourselves.”
Sometimes, those questions are hard to answer. The world wants to give us an equation to help us answer those questions. Do you know what an equation is? (If you have something to draw on, you might write out 2+2=4 to demonstrate a simple equation.)
Here’s the equation the world gives us to answer our identity (write this out somewhere)
OO + MP = MI
Other people’s Opinions + My Performance = My Identity
You can ask, “Is that a steady or shaky way to live? Can we control what others think? Will we always have perfect days?
While it doesn’t spell it out in equation form, the Bible gives us a better equation to form our identity, something much stronger. Here’s the equation the Bible gives us:
JO + JP = MI
Jesus’s Opinion of Me + Jesus’s Performance = My Identity
Jesus didn’t wait for us to be good enough. He died for us while we were still sinners, and through Him we become new people, fully loved, fully accepted, and completely His.
“But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
- Romans 5:8“God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”
- 2 Corinthians 5:21
That’s good news!
But there’s more to our identity than we can discover in Scripture. We’re going to use a triangle to explore that today. We’ll call it the Identity Triangle, a picture of who God is, and who we are because of Him.
Here’s the truth we need to know:
If we know who God is, then we will know who we are.
Family Activity: Draw the Triangle
Before reading the next section, have every person in your family grab a sheet of paper and draw a big triangle.
At each corner, leave space to label:
Top: God
Bottom left: Jesus
Bottom right: Holy Spirit
As you walk through each section this week, write in what each part of the Trinity tells us about who God is, and what that means about who you are and who we are.
GOD IS OUR FATHER → I AM HIS CHILD
Have a different child or parent read the verses below out loud. Think about the ages of your children and their attention span. You might read only one verse instead of multiple. Remember, you don’t have to completely grasp everything in one moment. If you need to come back to it, feel that freedom.
“To all who believed him... he gave the right to become children of God.”
— John 1:12“You received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, ‘Abba, Father.’”
— Romans 8:15
God isn’t only a powerful Creator, He’s a perfect Dad. He made us, knows us, and loves us more than we can imagine.
That means you are not an accident. You are not forgotten.
You are His child. You belong in His family. You are safe, loved, and known.
In the triangle, next to “God,” write: Perfect Dad → I am His child → We are the Family of God
JESUS IS OUR KING → I AM HIS DISCIPLE
Take turns reading these verses aloud as a family. Think about the ages of your children and their attention span. You might read only one verse instead of multiple. Remember, you don’t have to completely grasp everything in one moment. If you need to come back to it, feel that freedom.
“For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
- Mark 10:45“Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet.”
- John 13:14
Jesus is not a boss who demands perfection, He’s a Servant King. He washed feet, forgave sinners, and gave up His life out of love.
That means you can trust Him. You are His disciple. You learn from Him and follow His example by serving others.
In the triangle, next to “Jesus,” write: Servant King → I am his disciple → We are his servants
HOLY SPIRIT IS OUR HELPER → I AM A TEMPLE
Have another family member read these verses aloud. Think about the ages of your children and their attention span. You might read only one verse instead of multiple. Remember, you don’t have to completely grasp everything in one moment. If you need to come back to it, feel that freedom.
“Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you.”
— 1 Corinthians 6:19“You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you… and you will be my witnesses.”
— Acts 1:8
Jesus didn’t leave us alone. He sent the Spirit to live in us, guide us, and send us into the world with His love and power.
That means you are not too young to be part of God’s mission. You are a helper and a light. You are sent into your school, team, or neighborhood to bring peace and truth.
In the triangle, next to “Holy Spirit,” write: Helper & Guide → I am a temple → We are his witnesses
This Week’s Goal
Come back to this triangle throughout the week. Hang it on the fridge or the bedroom wall. Let these truths become more than words—they’re your real identity, rooted in who God is.
Week 2:
GOD IS OUR FATHER → I AM HIS CHILD → WE ARE THE FAMILY OF GOD
Start With Curiosity
Parents, always begin with curiosity before instruction. Ask something like:
What do you think God is like?
What does it mean to be part of a family?
Have you ever felt really loved or really left out? What was that like?
Let the conversation unfold. There are no wrong answers, this is space for listening, not correcting.
Scripture: What Does God Say?
Have a different family member read each verse aloud. If your kids are younger, just choose one.
“To all who believed him... he gave the right to become children of God.”
— John 1:12“You received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, ‘Abba, Father.’”
— Romans 8:15“I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.”
— 2 Corinthians 6:18
Who Is God?
God is not a distant Creator, He’s a perfect Dad. He made you, knows you, and loves you.
Jesus called God “Abba,” which means “Dad” or “Papa.” That’s how close God wants to be.
He’s strong enough to protect, kind enough to forgive, and close enough to listen, always.
Who Am I? And Who Are We?
You are God’s child. You don’t have to earn His love. It’s already yours.
And because we all belong to Him, we belong to each other, too.
I am His child → We are the Family of God.
Triangle Reflection
Go back to your triangle from Week 1 and find the top corner: God.
Reread what you wrote: Perfect Dad → I am His child → We are the Family of God
Add a small drawing, maybe a heart, a crown, a home, or a group of stick figures.
Family Reflection
Ask: How can our family act like God’s family this week?
Examples: Forgive quickly, eat together, include someone, and pray for each other.
Week 3:
JESUS IS OUR KING → I AM HIS DISCIPLE → WE ARE HIS SERVANTS
Start With Curiosity
Invite reflection with simple questions:
What do you think it means that Jesus is a King?
How does Jesus lead differently than other leaders?
What do you think it looks like to follow Jesus today?
Again, you’re not looking for polished answers, just openness.
Scripture: What Does Jesus Say?
Take turns reading these. Choose one if attention spans are short.
“For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
— Mark 10:45“Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet.”
— John 13:14“If anyone serves me, he must follow me.”
— John 12:26
Who Is Jesus?
Jesus is our Servant King.
He didn’t use power to make others serve Him, He used love to serve others. He washed feet, healed the sick, and gave up His life for us.
Who Am I? And Who Are We?
You are His disciple, His student, His follower, His friend.
And together, we are His servants, joining Him in helping, loving, and serving others.
I am His disciple → We are His servants.
Triangle Reflection
Find the Jesus corner of your triangle.
Reread what you wrote: Servant King → I am His disciple → We are His servants.
Add a small drawing, maybe a crown, a basin, and a towel, or footprints on a path.
Family Reflection
Ask: What’s one way we can serve someone this week as a family?
Ideas: Make a card, clean something together, help a neighbor, bring cookies to someone lonely.
Week 4:
HOLY SPIRIT IS OUR HELPER → I AM A TEMPLE → WE ARE HIS WITNESSES
Start With Curiosity
Warm up with questions like:
Have you ever heard someone talk about the Holy Spirit? What do you think He does?
What’s one way God might help us live like Jesus?
Do you think God sends us to help others?
Encourage curiosity and wonder, especially if your kids don’t yet understand the Spirit. That’s okay.
Scripture: What Does the Spirit Do?
Let each person choose one to read aloud.
“Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you.”
— 1 Corinthians 6:19“You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you… and you will be my witnesses.”
— Acts 1:8“The Helper, the Holy Spirit… will teach you all things and remind you of everything I have told you.”
— John 14:26
Who Is the Holy Spirit?
The Holy Spirit is God’s Helper, Guide, and Sender. He doesn’t just live near us, He lives in us.
The Spirit helps us become like Jesus, reminds us of truth, gives us courage, and sends us into the world with His love.
Who Am I? And Who Are We?
You are a temple of the Spirit; God’s Spirit lives in you.
And together, we are His witnesses, people who show and tell the world what God is like.
I am a temple → We are His witnesses.
Triangle Reflection
Find the Holy Spirit corner of your triangle.
Reread what you wrote: Helper & Guide → I am a temple → We are His witnesses.
Add a small drawing—maybe a flame, a dove, a lightbulb, or an open door.
Family Reflection
Ask: Where might God be sending us this week?
Ideas: Pray for a friend, invite someone over, visit someone in need, or leave a note of encouragement.
You Did It!
(BUT IT’S JUST THE BEGINNING)
You’ve spent a month grounding your family’s identity in who God is, Father, Son, and Spirit. This triangle is not just a picture…it’s a way to live.
Keep it nearby. Revisit it. When your kids are discouraged, confused, or proud, come back to it:
Who is God? And what does that mean about who I am?
