Made for More Shalom

It is an understatement to say we encounter free-floating anxiety pretty much everywhere these days 

—at work and school, in our organizations, in politics, and in our homes and families. We can sense our muscles tightening, our jaws clenching, and our blood pressure rising when the anxiety of others creeps into our psyche and hooks us emotionally, physically, and even spiritually.

Family systems therapist Edwin Friedman coined the term “non-anxious presence” to describe the person who is able to not be drawn into the fray of anxiety swirling around them.

Being non-anxious doesn’t mean we don’t feel fear, anxiety, depression, or panic. Being non-anxious means we learn to identify our own anxieties and process them with Jesus and my three closest relationships in a healthy, Gospel-informed way. As we learn to do this, we can become the “shalom presence” in a tense situation, the listening ear, and validating voice that helps another return to shalom.

Jesus is the ultimate non-anxious, shalom-providing presence in our lives.

The background of Jesus’ life’s work is the book of Isaiah. In Luke 4:16-21, Jesus walks into the synagogue, and by no accident the scroll of Isaiah is handed to Him. Jesus unrolls it and proclaims His “mission of shalom” this way:

“The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”

Then he says, “Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.”

Jesus’ affirmation of this text makes it clear that healing and wholeness is a central task of His mission. Theologian, N.T. Wright, says that the healing miracles of Jesus are the gift of God’s shalom. Shalom is a Hebrew word packed with meaning: it most literally means “peace,” but in the broader Biblical context, refers to God’s “goodness” and His “wholeness.”

In other words, shalom is not just “peace” as some sort of “cease fire,” but rather the total restoration of wholeness in every area of a person’s life and surroundings.

Jesus came to mend what had been broken, restoring wholeness in us and then, through us. Again, Isaiah prophetically describes Jesus’ redeeming work on the cross through the lens of shalom:

But he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace (shalom), and with his wounds we are healed.
Isaiah 53:5


Destroyer of Shalom: Trauma

There was a Great Divorce between Adam and Eve and God and creation when temptation from the serpent led to the first sin. A rupture occurred within the extended spiritual family system. A rupture is defined as: 1) an instance of breaking or bursting suddenly and entirely, 2) a breach of a harmonious relationship.

This relational fracture was traumatic on so many levels. It was this very rupture that created devastating consequences, not only to all of creation, but it also contributed to the death of the spirit, soul and body of humankind. God’s wonderful creation fell apart. The souls of humanity broke. Relationships were severed.

These disastrous ruptures bring trauma into our lives.

Trauma is an event or experience that overwhelms an individual’s emotional and relational capacity to process new experiences. We can look at trauma in two ways. We identify some as the “trauma of bad things” and others, the “trauma of absence.”

The Trauma of Absence:

God designed us to grow and thrive in our family of origin. He created the idea for the family so we could know and be known, love, and be loved.

Individuals must receive secure attachment, joy, rest, nurturing love, and opportunities to develop through their nuclear family. Through these nurturing relationships, we learn to give these same things away.

“‘Trauma A’ comes from the absence of good things we should all receive things that give us emotional stability and security. These absences create difficulties in relationships” (Wilder, Living from the Heart Jesus Gave You).

The trauma of absence is directly connected to our Garden of Eden mandate. God’s intention for a family was good. Humankind has messed it up.

Through Jesus’ death and resurrection, we are brought into a new family, God’s family! Through our adoption, our place in God’s family can heal “traumas of absence” over time. As we are loved and nurtured in this new family, we serve and disciple others, helping them to grow up emotionally as well. When we learn to give and receive love in this safe, nurturing environment, we can be healed.

The Trauma of Bad Things:
The “Trauma from Bad Things” can happen when harmful events in our life damage us physically or emotionally. We point to these events and know what shouldn’t have happened. These raw memories are stored up, and a host of overwhelming emotions that war against shalom occurs. Trauma brings pain.

When we have traumatic memories of events, we have to understand that time does not heal all wounds. The wounds of trauma do not disappear when we store them in the far back recesses of our minds and refuse to think about them.

There is good news, though. We know that Jesus can heal the memories of traumatic events. The healing of trauma will happen most fully in relationship. 

We were wounded in a family. Jesus’ plan is for each of us to be healed in an extended spiritual family. As you build trust over time, you can share this pain with each other, bearing one another’s burdens. 


KC Underground embraces a holistic approach to trauma healing: 

  • Secure Spiritual Family

  • Talking with a licensed therapist 

  • Inner healing prayer

  • Spiritual Direction

  • Soul Care 


In the healing process, Shalom is restored when there is forgiveness for wrong things done to me or the wrong things done by me. The manifest presence of The Spirit of Jesus encounters our broken hearts and speaks words of life, love, and healing. Jesus and His deep love can bring freedom!

The oldest family in existence is the one the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit share.

Jesus provided the way of adoption into Heaven’s family-we get to be a part of it! When we enter into God’s family system, love can heal us and restore us. Through Jesus, we are the Trinitarian extended family image-bearers. We are adopted sons, daughters, fathers, and mothers, bound to a city called New Jerusalem- invited into this deep ocean of a love bond between the Father, Son, and Spirit.

The Gospel of Jesus reaches our Spirit; the work of His Spirit continues to take more ground by healing, recovering, and restoring the emotions of our soul. Focusing on a soul level, our responsibility today is to both identify where we might be stuck in trauma and then begin to say “yes” to enter into the lifelong journey as an overcomer—to learn how to effectively steward the garden of our own heart and the hearts of our spiritual extended families on mission.


Destroyer of Shalom: Fear

Fear is the feeling of, “I have to get away,” or, “something bad is about to happen.” 

ALL negative emotions serve a redemptive purpose that creates healthy boundaries of protection when we are overwhelmed as infants and children. When these emotions are unable to quiet in certain situations and remain in “overdrive” longer than they should, it becomes EXTREMELY difficult to operate in a regular rhythm and lifestyle of Shalom.

As a result, we must begin the process of recognizing when a negative emotion like this keeps us from acting like ourselves for an extended period of time, and learn how to return to shalom. 

When you experience fear, how does it manifest in your life?

Some examples might include:

  • Racing Thoughts

  • Muscle Tension

  • Rapid Breathing

  • Increased Heart Rate/Blood Pressure

The goal of identifying these things is not to avoid fear, but to know how to navigate these feelings well and keep these situations from robbing you of shalom. 

Becoming intentional to identify where in your mind and body these things occur will begin the equipping process on how to master and take every thought captive when they arise from this place. 


The Shalom Psalm

A Practice of Returning to Shalom

The Psalms are where the people of God expressed, in an unedited way, both their desperate need for shalom and their soul-refreshing pictures of shalom.

Consider Psalm 23 as David’s Shalom Psalm. 

David describes, through his life experience as a shepherd, what Shalom looks like and feels like both internally and externally. He describes what it looks like and feels like when everything is in the right place, at the right time, and the right amount, even when in difficult circumstances, like traversing the valley of the shadow of death and the attacking presence of enemies.

Stop here before going forward and read through a couple different translations of Psalm 23.

  • Psalm 23 NIV

    The Lord is my shepherd,
    I lack nothing.
    He makes me lie down
    in green pastures,
    he leads me beside quiet waters,
    he refreshes my soul.
    He guides me along
    the right paths
    for his name’s sake.
    Even though I walk through the darkest valley,
    I will fear no evil,
    for you are with me;
    your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.
    You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
    You anoint my head with oil;
    my cup overflows.
    Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,
    and I will dwell in the
    house of the Lord forever.

  • God, my shepherd! I don’t need a thing. You have bedded me down in lush meadows, you find me quiet pools to drink from. True to your word, you let me catch my breath and send me in the right direction. Even when the way goes through Death Valley, I’m not afraid when you walk at my side. Your trusty shepherd’s crook makes me feel secure. You serve me a six-course dinner right in front of my enemies. You revive my drooping head; my cup brims with blessing. Your beauty and love chase after me every day of my life. I’m back home in the house of God for the rest of my life.

Consider how personal this Psalm was to David. His story and experience as a shepherd shape and inform all the imagery. Imagine how David would return to this Psalm throughout the seasons of his life as a way of returning to this very personal definition of shalom.

Take out some paper and walk through these steps to write your own Shalom Psalm, considering how your story and experiences can shape and inform your Psalm like David’s informed his.

What is the right place of shalom for you?

  • Record the imagery around a place you dearly love, which helps you most experience shalom. Mountains? Beach? Desert? A comfy home? A special place you love to return to again and again?

    For David, it was the green pastures and rolling hillsides where he spent his youth as a shepherd boy. He speaks of still waters, green pastures, paths, valleys, etc.

    What is your shalom spot?
    e.g. I love mountains. I love how the mist hangs over the mountains in the morning at sunrise. The soothing sound of water bubbling over the stones in the mountain stream is my favorite sound; it washes over me as I lay on my back on a flat boulder in the middle of that stream. I’m quieted by the ancient forests with trees whose roots reach down deep and whose branches touch the sky. As I sit quietly under their shade, resting against the trunk, I know the trees have my back, and I can be at rest.

What are the things (experiences, feelings, activities, objects) that when they are in the right amount create a sense of shalom in you?

  • Make a list of the things which help you most experience shalom.

    For David, it was lying down in pastures, having a rod and staff in his hand (the tools of his trade), walking on right paths, a table prepared with a wonderful meal, the feeling of anointing oil rolling down his head, a cup overflowing with his favorite drink, being in the house of the Lord, etc.

    Some of the images make sense out in the pasture, like a rod and a staff.

    However, it was highly unlikely that anyone ever set up a table feast out in the pasture while he was shepherding! Ha! But David brought that image into his Shalom Psalm because being with the people he loved for a prepared meal where there was more than enough...the cups were overflowing...were the right things in the right amount for him.

    In other words, don’t feel locked into imagery that “makes sense” for your Shalom spot. Bring whatever good thing you want in there. Anything that symbolizes shalom for you can be included.

How do those places and things reflect or mediate the presence and character of Jesus to you?

  • Record the aspect of Jesus’ character and presence that those places and things reveal to you.

    All shalom finds its source in Jesus. Those places and things are a signpost pointing to him. David’s love of shepherding revealed to him, “The Lord is my Shepherd.” The green pastures and still waters revealed to him that God refreshes his soul. When he had life-threatening moments, like facing off against a lion or a bear, he realized, “God was with me. Every second!” So, he could say, “...even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for you are with me.”

    Now, consider the things you love most about Jesus and how your shalom spot and shalom items from question 1 and 2, reveal and reflect what you love most about Jesus.

Now, don’t hold yourself to the standard of David, but take a shot at writing your own Shalom Psalm. 

Let your Psalm incorporate your shalom spot, shalom items, and how they reveal Jesus to you. Have fun with it. Don’t shoot for perfection. Write a poem, or a song, or a piece of creative writing. Make it yours. Let it be something you can return to when you’re facing Shalom Destroyers to help bring your mind, body, and spirit back to shalom.

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